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Sorry to go off topic - but I do echo your sentiments in the above reply Doghouse. I just wanted to ask you if that is your dog in the avatar, and how old he or she is in the pic and in real life. It's just my life changed two months ago and now I'm alone so I need a companion. I have always loved retrievers, but I'm thinking of getting a small dog this time. I fancy a miniature dachshund - my mom had one named Trudy, and she was very loving and very bright. Is the dog in your avatar a spaniel? My dad bought a golden cocker spaniel for me when I was born and my mom christened him Mr. Woe. I also had a full sized dachshund when I was a kid and he was dumb - but not that hard to love, so I am a trifle worried Trudy might have been an exception to  the rule.  

Without knowing if the change to which you refer is the result of some unhappy circumstance, it kinda sounds like it. If that's the case, I'm truly sorry it is. 

That's Duncan the Delinquent Dachshund in the avatar, and he was indeed a miniature. He passed on four years ago, and was really my late hubby's dog and devoted to him. David was his universe. I guess he was four or five when the photo was taken.

Duncan was willful, and quite intelligent; enough so to feign just the opposite when he thought it would suit his purposes. The trainer we hired when he was just a pup told us that's not uncommon in the breed. A note about that: it wasn't until her fifth visit that we realized she was here to train us more than Duncan. That's how dumb we were. Relentlessly energetic, cheerful and full of mischief, he got along great with the kitties (even if they didn't always appreciate his attentions) and was intensely loyal to David, but we really needed to ride herd on him to get him to mind.

Whatever breed you choose, I'm sure you'll know the right pet on first meeting. 

I read your story on the other board, and you know you have my deepest sympathy as well as empathy, as we're both coping with loss and grief. I've had a bit longer learning to live with my own, David having passed the first week of January, 41 years practically to the day that we embarked on our life together. I say "life" in the singular, as that's how I thought of it: we became no longer two people, but halves of a unit, for the last 25 or so years of which we were together virtually 24/7, even developing a kind of telepathy. Entire conversations could be had in two or three partial sentences, or nothing more than exchanged glances, often culminating in shared laughter that mystified others. 

What you wrote about Sonja turning routine things into adventures really struck a chord. David and I would often say we had more fun going to the grocery store together than at any party. And I quite know what you mean about feeling safest in the familiar surroundings you shared. I could scarcely reach a decision about their disposition in not much over 2 months (and indeed haven't in over 7), but I suspect that, just as with choosing a pet, you'll know when it's right. 

Please feel free to PM any time you feel you need to share, unload, celebrate, rage, commiserate, discuss, compare or whatever it might be. My best to your daughter, too. The relationships we work at hardest can be the ones most worth cherishing. May it comfort and sustain you. 

And thanks to wmcclain for allowing us to piggyback on your thread.