IMDB1 needs a board of directors

Forgive me if I speak bluntly. The internet grows smaller every day, and bad attitudes can no longer be tolerated. There must be a troll free zone for all. Now, this does not mean giving up any opinion except the opinion your shit does not stink. 

Your ancestors knew this when they actually talked on the telephones and used party lines to eavesdrop on the neighbors.

We of the other planets have long accepted this principle. We have an organization for the mutual opinions that all cyber trolling should face elimination. The test of any such higher anti-trolling is, of course, the Admin anti-troll force that supports it.

For our Admin, we created a race of unbiased bots. Their function is to bot the webs—using devices just like the ones you are holding in hands—to preserve good manners. This power cannot be revoked.

At the first sign of gaslighting, they act automatically against the troll. The penalty for provoking their action is too terrible to risk. The result is that we live in peace, without snark or bullying, secure in the knowledge that we are free from shitty trolls. 

Now, we do not pretend to have achieved perfection, but we do have a system, and it works.

I came here to give you these facts. It is no concern of ours how you run your own websites. But if you threaten to extend your cyberbullying, this Board of yours will be reduced to a burned-out version of V2.

Your choice is simple: Join us and live in harmony, or pursue your present course and face obliteration.

We shall be waiting for your answer; the decision rests with you.