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Post by Power Ranger on Jul 24, 2020 6:58:26 GMT
Write a paragraph and someone else writes the next paragraph.
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Post by Power Ranger on Jul 24, 2020 7:00:25 GMT
Flying Monkeys was stressed as he exited his hovel for his daily commute. His Pakistani landlords were bothering him about the overdue rent, so he desperately hoped that he sold some shoes that day.
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Post by yggdrasil on Jul 24, 2020 7:52:53 GMT
"I must buy a hat", he pondered, it had been his dream for many years now, but his oddly sized head and lack of funds had hampered him and now as a last option lead him into the "shoe game".
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Post by Power Ranger on Jul 25, 2020 0:05:00 GMT
A hat could aid his goal of attracting his coworker Susan, he reasoned. Flying Monkeys had been single for many years by now. A diet of canned soup and b-films interspersed with the occasional game of squash was not how he imagined his life to be.
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Post by yggdrasil on Jul 25, 2020 8:39:25 GMT
A hat could aid his goal of attracting his coworker Susan, he reasoned. Flying Monkeys had been single for many years by now. A diet of canned soup and b-films interspersed with the occasional game of squash was not how he imagined his life to be. "Susan" was not a conventional woman though, and no ordinary hat would turn that heavily jowelled countenance in his direction. Thinking of "her" monobrow and archaic use of snuff made something stir deep within. Shoes were his life, but, damn it, Susie would be his wife. |
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Post by Power Ranger on Jul 30, 2020 12:10:29 GMT
‘Things will be back to normal around mid-May’, declared Monkeys as he entered the shoe store. He always opened with what he hoped would be received as insightful statements, hoping to impress Susan and the other staff.
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Post by Flying Monkeys on Jul 30, 2020 22:51:19 GMT
Having bought Amazon and Apple at the bottom, the more Monkeys was wrong, the better off he became.
"This is the best being wrong has ever been," he smiled to himself.
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Post by yggdrasil on Aug 1, 2020 10:07:34 GMT
Monkeys eyesight had been failing for a long time due to his obsessive onanism and work stitching his own range of dayglo flip flops, no one had the heart to tell him his shares in Mamazon bra company and Dapple Paints were worthless, his dreams of himself and Susan, hand in hand, hats on head, promenading on the French Riviera just a foolish pipe dream.
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Post by Flying Monkeys on Aug 1, 2020 12:42:43 GMT
Monkeys thought about the little people and their little victory.
Then he thought about his own much, much bigger victory. He liked to be right, but he liked expensive squash bats even more.
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Post by Flying Monkeys on Aug 1, 2020 19:20:37 GMT
Meanwhile, Yggdrasil sat in the corner of the Old Nag in a fug of his real ale farts.
"You dirty old barstard," said the bauble-earringed knackered-looking east end barmaid.
"Leavit aaaaaat," he said, "aaave been brewing at for four aaaaaahs an no mistake innit. Gertcha!"
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Post by yggdrasil on Aug 2, 2020 13:03:16 GMT
Meanwhile, Yggdrasil sat in the corner of the Old Nag in a fug of his real ale farts. "You dirty old barstard," said the bauble-earringed knackered-looking east end barmaid. "Leavit aaaaaat," he said, "aaave been brewing at for four aaaaaahs an no mistake innit. Gertcha!" East End? Urrrrggghh |
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Post by yggdrasil on Aug 2, 2020 13:05:55 GMT
Monkeys thought about the little people and their little victory. Then he thought about his own much, much bigger victory. He liked to be right, but he liked expensive squash bats even more. Suddenly, and without warning, Monkeys penis fell off. Oh, no, not again he softly wept. |
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Post by Power Ranger on Aug 2, 2020 15:49:49 GMT
‘Shut up, Monkeys’, said Mr Singh, the manager, who was oblivious to the problems occurring in Monkeys’ trousers. ‘You’re late’. Susan giggled. She was after all a female, more or less, and therefore disliked Monkeys.
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Post by yggdrasil on Aug 2, 2020 19:16:06 GMT
Sorry Mr. Singh, wailed Monkeys, but it's me todger. It's only gorn and bleedin' fallen off again. Monkeys attempt at a London accent disgusted Singh, a proud EastEnder and he kicked monkeys violently in the head.
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Post by Power Ranger on Aug 3, 2020 17:21:30 GMT
Monkeys awoke in heaven, or at least, what his limited mind perceived that to be. He was in a room with Susan which was not the shoe store. Susan shattered Monkeys dream when she informed him that he was in hospital and she was there at the request of Mr Singh, to ensure that Monkeys was not malingering.
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