IMDB Poster Top News! 11.21.24

OfUnknownOrigins ’ soul has been rejected entry into Heaven by St Peter.  The revered saint citing Origins’ repeated online trolling of message boards since 1993 and sexual perversions led him to deny him entry into Heaven. Origins was seized by two buff angels in thongs and will be sent to Purgatory to atone.

The Herald Erjen has decided to join the Illuminati. When reached for a quote he said, “If you can’t beat’em, join’em.”

Christmas illuminations will be even brighter this year after fat, brainless American ShadowSouL Likes This was sentenced today to two years in a pink asylum for the crime of extreme retardation. Judge Harry Skywalker  declared him to be an abomination and ‘basically a terrorist’.

OverQualifiedFktard will be Carl LaFong ’s latest sex slave wife after clicking on his signature.  gwyn rejected Power Ranger ’s marriage proposal citing his tendency to dress like the Pink Ranger in public.

Turkish fashion icon jill2  has announced her retirement from the board. The 63 year old Imam said she was leaving because of stalking and racism but failed to provide evidence.

British heart throb and legendary cross dresser Flying Monkeys is reportedly back in the dating scene after breaking up with his 20yo girlfriend. Onlookers say the trouble started when the British businessman spilled his beer into the brunette’s packet of Winston. ‘Whacha do dat for ya sodding git?’ she screamed,  to which Mr. Monkeys replied, ‘Blimey, iz you da Queen or sumfink?’.

In Norwegian news: popular poster Feologild has brushed aside suggestions that he will return to Mr Monkeys’ board as he says he is too busy watching season three of My Two Dads. When asked if he would consider returning in the future he said, ‘may be’.

thekindercarebear tried to check himself into rehab for his Coca-Cola addiction. Officials at the rehab rejected him and said if he got into the “really fun coke“ he could come back.